Lace em up...

Lace em up...

Saturday, November 19, 2016

Decimated arms, potluck blues and a disappearing bosom...

My week (November 14 - 19) in pictures from Instagram...


November 14th...


Sixes, twelves and twenty fours. That was my workout with Tony this morning. All upper body and all challenging because the idea is that I'm supposed to fail. So I did 6 assisted pull ups (it was set so I was pulling 100 pounds), followed by 12 ring pulls, followed by 24 arm curls. All done one right after the other. I rested for 90 seconds then repeated the sequence 3 more times.


Then I did 6x 100 pound pull downs, 12 push ups and 24 lying tricep extensions. That was also done for 4 sets. On my last set of tricep extensions, Tony announced that I failed. Which I did. I think I only got to 16. Then he had me "decimate" my arms with a few more rounds of arm curls and some tricep kick backs. My arms felt tight and tired. Today's macros were just okay. I ate 4g too much of protein and not enough fat. Off to bed. 4am alarm...



November 15th...


The pic on the left was taken on September 3rd, the day after Julien and I went to Wonderland (note hand stamp), and 3 days after I began on line training with Mac Fitness. The pic on the right was taken this past Sunday. The difference is 13 pounds and I think I look leaner. Brodie and Tony both insist there's a difference. And I know there's a difference because I can feel it in my clothes. It's only going to get better from here.


I've been cut by 400 calories per day and I'm working out harder. So working harder on less food leaves me mangry (macro anger) and I'm hungry more times than not. But I'm not sluggish or light headed. I'm learning to space small meals frequently throughout my day which helps a lot. I do crave protein though. I never thought I'd say that. I always complained I had too much to eat in a day. Since protein has been cut by about 25g, I want it back. You always want what you don't have.


Now that I've started to whine about how horrible my life is, I may as well continue to roll with it. I'm sore (cue the violin). Thank you Tony. My arms were completely useless today. I almost cancelled on Brodie tonight but went, had an awesome workout and then let him throw the medicine ball at my gut again. I'm feeling all sorry for myself right now and dreading the gym in the morning. But I will be there at 5am with the few of us who are there at that time. My good friends; Profusely Sweating Bike Guy, Machine Grunting Guy, and (my bestie) Cross Fit Girl With Perfect Makeup and Zero Body Fat. I might have a girl crush on her. I'm part of a club and I feel included. Granted it's a silent club and none of us actually speak to one another. We just nod acknowledgement of our existence. But if I don't see one of them there I wonder. Wonder where they are. I'll not do that to them. It could ruin a person's workout. And I always strive to be a good friend. Lack of food has me talking gibberish...



November 16th...


Today was a challenge all around. I woke at 4am and sobbed quietly for 15 minutes before I convinced myself that it would be worse if I didn't go to the gym. So I went. And the same thing happened that always happens when I don't feel like going. I had an awesome workout. I came home, ate, showered and dressed, then grabbed my work bag and my crock pot full of honey garlic meatballs and made my way to the T-Dot.


Why the meatballs you ask? It was my unit's potluck lunch and that was my contribution. You wanna know what I did for lunch? I got a salad from Subway that I had already figured the macros for on a nutrition calculator. I ate my salad while my colleagues ate jerk chicken, samosas, lasagna, baklava and homemade perogies. That's right. I said homemade perogies. And they ate my meatballs and told me they were delicious.


And that awesome Banana Republic blazer I'm wearing on the left? To add insult to injury, I got honey garlic sauce on it. Just got it from the cleaner last week. I bought it at Value Village for ten bucks or something. But on a positive note, the boots I wore today? I got them from Reitman's at the end of season last year. They were 20 bucks and I couldn't zip them up the top of my calves. I figured I'd wear them with boot cut jeans. But I was pleasantly surprised when they easily zipped today. And my coworker told me that she can really notice a difference in my hips and legs since I started counting macros. We had a moment and I may have told her I loved her.


I went to see my athletic therapist, Megan, today. It's been a few weeks due to scheduling conflicts. I fell asleep while she was working on my shoulder on account that I was exhausted. But no time for rest. After my 10 minute power nap, I got Julien from the sitter, made dinner and then we headed to the boxing gym. I was done when my 30 minutes was up. Eighty 1-2 punches with my aching arms was not easy. Which brings us to my favourite part of the day. Rice cakes and natural peanut butter. And now it's lights out. I've got Tony in the morning. It's leg day which means trap bar, squats and RDL's...



November 18th...


Today was a good day. I took a vacation day. It started out with a massage. The massage wasn't too much fun. It's not a spa massage I get. Sports massage is mostly painful and requires concentration and breathing exercises. Kinda like labour. But I always feel better afterwards. And my masseur Mark told me that even though we've been talking about my new fitness program for a couple months, today is the first day he noticed real definition in my body. That's nice to hear from the only man who sees me mostly naked. I said mostly (for the gutter brains:-)!!!! I saw him 4 weeks ago so it's nice to know that progress is being made.


After my massage, I drove to Scarborough to meet my brother and we took care of some financial stuff regarding my father. That was a relief and lessened my stress level instantly. I took my brother out to lunch then headed back to Hamilton to pick up Julien from school. We went to his school's Christmas bazaar where he blew $10 in record time. When I got home, I changed into my lounge wear, made dinner and drank sparkling water with lemon because you know, wine does not fit my macros today. That makes me mangry. But I've got Sunday to look forward to.


Today was a rest day from the gym. I've already done 6 workouts this week. I've got the weekend to get through and I get to start all over again on Monday. Macros were okay. I'm done eating for the day and I've got 2g of fat and 2g of protein left. Only two more sleeps till my heavy macro day! Maybe I'll have dark chocolate and red wine...



November 19th...


I regret to inform you that although I'm losing fat in some places I should, not all areas are cooperating. I asked my bosom to remain intact as I've already lost an enormous amount of boobage, but alas, it did not listen. I've noticed my bras are getting bigger. All of them. Sports, push up, padded, strapless. You name the style, it's getting way too roomy. I'm not wearing a padded bra today. This contorted pose wasn't easy to hold, but necessary in coming clean.

I'm a fraud. A fraud who wears figure enhancing bras. Because I have to. Look at pictures in previous posts. All a sham. I don't got it, so I have to fake it. But this just helps me solidify my decision of whether or not I should get a breast augmentation. I believe, with 100% certainty, that this summer, I will be getting the mommy makeover. Tummy tuck and breast lift with implants. And no I'm not getting ginormous breasts. Just ones big enough to fill out what I should naturally be without all the sagging and loose skin. So basically the way I look in pictures but I won't need the padded push up bra anymore. RIP once again bosom...


November 19th...


  • Looking through a box of old pictures I got from my dad's house this afternoon. Found some that made me smile. From top left; My mom on her second Christmas with my dad. She got a television. Their first one. That photo's from 1959. The photo below is also from the same Christmas. My parents in their first apartment on Jameson Avenue in Toronto. The photo below that is my second birthday. My mom put me in a headdress any chance she got. So politically incorrect:-) Those are my brothers, my sister and my foster sister. My parents fostered children from 1965 until my mom's death in 2003.


  • Beside that is my dad and me, of course. That's from high school. As you can see, I was obese then too. And next is my dad in his uniform. He worked at the Royal York Hotel for 40 years. That's how he met my mom. She worked at a hat factory on York Street and he'd tip his hat to her when she passed him every day. And the top right photo is from 1957. That's my mom working in the hat factory. That's one year before she married my father. I love that picture. I'm going to get it restored, enlarged and framed. I'm taking a bunch of old photos to share with my cousin over wine tomorrow. Looking at old photos is bitter sweet. They make me smile but also sad. So many loved ones gone.

Until next week...